Wordless Wedneday and Remote Control

Sunrise on my morning walk

I’m READING!

My aunt let me borrow her Kindle, so I decided to read tonight instead of blog. We’ll see how long that lasts.

For now, here’s my Wordless Wednesday photo, and a repost from waaayyyy back in June!

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REMOTE CONTROL

Sunday night I was up at 11:30, which seems to have become my new bedtime. I’m one of those weirdos who goes to sleep with the TV on.

So, here’s what I had to pick from:If you suddenly find yourself only able to fit into clothes that have brand names like PEA IN A POD or MOMMY AND ME, if your stomach starts to do some hellacious moves on it’s own, and you’ve never taken a belly dancing class…and you’re well, not belly dancing, that could be a clue something’s wrong. And, If you start to look like you swallowed one of the Harlem Globetrotters basketballs, yep, there’s a issue.

Twins by Surprise: Okay, I’ve known a few women actually who’ve gotten pregnant and didn’t know it. I can’t quite understand how that happens though. If I so much as eat 3 extra french fries, my scale goes up 5 lbs… An extra baby? Not a chance.

Twins by surprise though? 

The Secret Life of the American Teengager: I thought this was very funny.

Teenagers today don’t have secrets, plain and simple.

When I was a kid, secrets were do-able. A good diary with a sturdy lock, well hidden from your little brother, and all of your secrets were safe.

I can barely pass wind and my kids have posted it on MySpace.

Okay, to be fair, I do post frequently on Facebook.

But, I am an adult and I know the limits, for the most part, of what constitutes a secret and what does not. Usually.

The next two choices were just awesome viewing material:

Half Ton Dad OR Why I Ran

Guess what the common theme was among these two shows?

No, there were no half ton men running anywhere.

Give up? Both shows took place in Houston. So we have half ton dads AND geniuses who try to out run the police, but instead are followed by the news helicopters, like there is a chance in hell that they are gonna get away with the whole city watching their every move.

Last choice? My favorite: ICE ROAD TRUCKERS

I have lived most of life in Texas.

We use ice for 2 things-iced tea and ice chests (usually full of beer.) Oh, I almost forgot, we also use ice for frozen Margaritas. That’s it.

We don’t walk on ice, we don’t stand on ice, we don’t fish on ice and we certainly do not drive on ice.

In fact, when the rare ice storm hits south Texas, most of us cannot make it to our mailbox without slipping and falling on our butts at least half a dozen times.

No native Texas would, in their right mind, drive on ice. Not even on a bicycle. You would be more likely to find me pregnant with twins by surprise than you would to find me driving any vehicle on ice.

These men have evidently made a career out of something that is unthinkable to those of us from the south. I don’t know what kind of mental state you have to be in to choose this as a job, but I sure hope they pay you well.

Now, if you’re from Houston, and you happen to move into this profession, you’ll probably be great at cutting off, tailgating or making creative hand gestures at the other Ice Road Truckers once you’re out on that ice lake.

Those were my choices. Pregnant teens. Half ton dads or people running from the police. Twins by Surprise (also known as “Women in denial that they have doubled in size over the course of nine months”.)

What has happend to our society that everything available on TV is a peek into the lives of people with issues that, 10 years ago none of would have ever known about, and we would have been just fine keeping it that way.

And if this is what’s on TV, I’ll take the kids playing Wii or X-Box any day of the week over television.

So, what channel did I land on?

Forensic Files.

Nothing like a serial killer to help you fall asleep.

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