I went for a mammogram last week, you know, the whole turning 40 thing. I actually had one when I was 35 so the process was not new to me.

I remember a few years ago, watching Oprah bemoan the mammogram process, and I thought she was silly. She kept referring to it as giving her ‘pancake boobs.’

Either I don’t have enough boob material, or she needs a new boob-ographer because neither time that I’ve been, have I walked out with pancakes, attached to me or in a to-go box.

I have a tremendous amount of respect for the people who do snap medical polaroids of mammary glands all day long. I could not do it. I used to think that doing pedicures for a living would be the worse job I could envision, but now I have a runner up.

I’m sure eventually, you’ve seen one boob, you’ve seen them all. But, it’s not just seeing them. They have to do some serious woman-handling to get you all squished into that machine. I just could not handle and smush and squish breasts all day long, I’m sorry.

These technicians were extremely nice. You can tell they do this all day, because as I stood there ready for my close up, we talked about kids and schools and where my kids attend school and where the technician’s attend, as if I stand there every day and talk to other women, naked from the waist up with pink pieces of tape on my chest.

And I kept thinking, ‘wow, I hope I don’t run into Wal-mart after standing here talking to you, half naked, about my kids in school?’

On the other hand, I’m mad. Really, really mad.

As many people know, the results of another medical ’study’  hit the airwaves this week, regarding women, mammograms and self-exams. I read several stories on the study, and listened as it was discussed on the morning talk shows. I understand that there is science here (supposedly) and that this was not about ancedontal evidence.

My response to that?

Who the freakin’ hell cares, pardon my language.

Most women my age have grown up hearing about the importance of mammograms and self-exams. I’m afraid these latest studies, and the confusing ones that I am sure will eventually follow, will start to reverse decades of education about these important tests.

I get the fact that mammographies can lead to unnecessary medical testing. But self exam? You will never sell me on a reason NOT to do that. Never. It’s free. It’s painless. And I am sure it’s saved many women’s lives.

I think that instead of telling women that mammographies are not useful, instead we need better follow up medical procedures to determine what happens if a mammogram shows a potential problem.

But to just blatantly blast across the airwaves that mammographies are not effective before the age of  50, seems to be to be irresonsible on the part of media groups and the medical community.

I heard Meredith Viera say that, although mammograms can produce false positives, that 1 in 1900 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer using a mammogram.

You tell me.

If that 1 out of 1900 women was your mom, or your sister, or your best friend, or YOU.

Would you think it was worth it?

Please, let the ladies who are trained to do this, lay their hands on your ladies.

And, you do the same once a month on your own.

Please.

Once a year. At least from the age of 40 until someone gives us a better reason not to.

Don’t be the one out of 1900.

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Breast Cancer Statistics from the CDC: http://www.cdc.gov/cancer/breast/statistics/

Even better info from the American Cancer Society:

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/CRI/content/CRI_2_4_3X_Can_breast_cancer_be_found_early_5.asp?rnav=cri

How to do a breast self exam: http://www.cancer.org/docroot/cri/content/cri_2_6x_how_to_perform_a_breast_self_exam_5.asp

And, if you need a reminder on WHY you should ignore the media and do breast exams, read these stories once a month:http://www.breastcancerstories.org/

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